How to score a speedy new computer at work
May 4th, 2006 by Accidental Thinker
- Suffer endlessly with a memory impaired system that is woefully inadequate for your resource-hog applications.
- Reboot frequently when the repeated virtual memory errors slow the machine down until it finally stops responding.
- Contemplate chucking the thing out the window during the 10 very long minutes it takes to complete the reboot.
- Complain to anyone who will listen about how slooooow your machine is, documented with specific examples.
- Complain some more.
- Continually apologize to those who are waiting for you to locate files on your uncooperative piece of junk.
- Silently curse the lack of compassion in your IT guys when they tell you that everyone thinks their system is too slow.
- Wait for a new IT guy to get hired.
- Give him a couple of weeks to settle in, then catch him while he’s still trying to make a good impression.
- Pitch the same pitiful sob story you’ve already pitched a million times to his predecessor.
- Sit back and watch while the industrious new guy snaps to attention, eager to prove himself useful.
- Within 24 hours, enjoy your speedy new computer. And don’t forget to proclaim the new guy’s genius.
I read a book for work a few years back called UNIX for Dummies. Not your everday thriller (HAH!!), but it still had a whole chapter on the ‘Care and Feeding of your UNIX Wizard’ (ie- the person who knows everything and is in a position to get you out of your most recent ‘crisis-du-jour’…the speed of crisis response is directly related to how well you have treated/cared for them during the non-crisis periods). It was suggested that you should randomly provide treats and goodies (cookies, chocolate, etc) when you DON’T need something, and you’re likely to be put on the top of the crisis pile when the need arises. Sounds like you have the PRIME opportunity to get in on the ground floor of ‘grooming’ the new IT guy to be your techie hero through a little well placed ‘Care and Feeding’!!!
That is a good idea!! I don’t need a new computer I just need speakers. I’ll try that next time they hire someone new.
Woohoo! Doesn’t take much, does it? 😉
Gotta love those “uncooperative pieces of junk” for setting one on a mission. ^5!
Easier said than done. But it’s a great idea. And Chapin’s advice about taking care of the local zoo inmates…er, IT guys, is a good idea, too.